Flashback Friday: Do you remember?

I’m writing this while watching Cooley High on Bounce TV. There is a scene where the guys attend a house party. Cochise asks the girl playing the records to play a slow jam and she does. The lights go off and the slow dragging begins.

That got me to thinking about my first slow dance. It happened at a convention that my dad took me to. There were all sorts of planned events for us kids. One was a dance.

I didn’t actually dance at the dance. I was 14 and still figuring out how to be a gay girl in a str8 world. But, there was a girl I liked and whom I thought liked me as well. So, after the dance there was a planned after party in one of the older kid’s hotel room.

There were about 20 of us there. The music started and the lights were dimmed. Someone brought some Heineken beer and poured a bunch of ice in the bathtub over the beer.

After a while everyone was having fun and most getting a little buzzed on the beer. Including me. So when someone dropped a slow jam on the boombox it didn’t take much for me and my crush to make our way to a corner to dance.

Surprisingly as we began to dance no one really looked at us like we were doing anything out of the ordinary. I suppose because of the people in this group there might have been more than just me and my crush who were walking on the gay side.

Anyway, I remember being really nervous. I tried to concentrate on moving to the beat of the music but as my crush held me tightly she kept beat for both of us. All I had to do was think about how good she smelled and how good it felt to be in her arms. I think I might have been trembling a bit too, while we were grinding to the music.

That first slow dance was really wonderful. It was sweet and warm and safe. Thinking about it reminds me of what drug users say about their first time doing drugs. How great that high was. And, that they spend the rest of their time after that chasing that same great high. But, it’s never as good as the first time.

That first slow dance was like that. I’ve never felt the same way since. I’ve had some epic slow dances since then but none as sweet and soft and wonderful as the first time.

Do you remember your first slow dance?
How do you refer to slow dancing; grinding, slow dragging or just slow dancing?

9 thoughts on “Flashback Friday: Do you remember?

  1. This was very revealing, Valentina. I feel like you TOOK me there. You had very strong instincts/gaydar for a 14 year-old girl. Glad you weren’t made to feel so damned alone in the world.

    I don’t recall my very FIRST slow drag, but I remember house parties, Afros, Li’l Abner’s w/ khakis, blue lights in someone’s basement, & there being a vast difference between slow dragging (which you did with someone you liked) & grinding (which you did w/ someone you lusted after). The latter usually got you & partner mad attention & those exploits were later gossiped about in school. AND… as I recall… many babies were born from the after effects of those notorious slow drags.

    BTW: Thanks for the support on the novel. 😀 LOVED & still LOVE Cooley High.

    Enjoy your weekend, Val.


    • Actually I have always had pretty good gaydar. That particular instance was more of an exception rather than the norm as far as acceptance. I really lucked out that summer.

      That’s interesting about the difference between slow dragging and grinding.

      I can’t wait to read it! 🙂

      Enjoy yours too, Lin.

  2. If I were to list my top ten favorite movies of all time, I’d have to have Cooley High in there somewhere. They just don’t seem to make movies like that anymore.

    Anyway, I honestly don’t remember my first dance like that…………and I’m seriously trying hard to. I’m sure it was either to Heatwave’s Always and Forever or Earth, Wind and Fire’s, Reasons. I don’t even remember her name, all I know is that it was someone’s daughter.

    After reading what you wrote Val, I’m sorry I don’t remember my experience.

    • Cooley High would be in my top 10 as well. It has not gotten its proper due, IMO.

      Reasons is one of the nicest slow jams ever, Reggie. And, Always and Forever isn’t too far behind.

      Me too. I would have liked to have heard about it.

      Enjoy the weekend, Reggie!

  3. ‘Shining my belt buckle’ while visiting Texas. I don’t remember the song, the girl’s name nor the reason I was here. All I remember is the the girl was light-skinned, had long curly hair, green eyes and that she smelled like she had just eaten a boudin.

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